Managing Emotions Archives - DuckboardsAndStilts.com https://duckboardsandstilts.com/category/managing-emotions/ Helping You To Unlock Your Untapped Potential Wed, 29 Jun 2022 21:28:29 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.8.1 Learn Your Emotional Buttons and How to Lessen Their Impact https://duckboardsandstilts.com/learn-your-emotional-buttons-and-how-to-lessen-their-impact/ https://duckboardsandstilts.com/learn-your-emotional-buttons-and-how-to-lessen-their-impact/#respond Wed, 29 Jun 2022 21:28:25 +0000 https://duckboardsandstilts.com/?p=20493 We all have emotional triggers. There are just situations and people that seem to set us off without warning. You might be enraged by someone…

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We all have emotional triggers. There are just situations and people that seem to set us off without warning. You might be enraged by someone that interrupts you, while someone else is bothered by clutter. We each have a unique set of emotional buttons. 

Our reaction is similar to a reflex. Someone presses the button and a negative emotional response springs into action. 

Disconnect your emotional buttons with these strategies: 

1. Observe yourself. You can learn a lot by observing yourself. You’re in a perfect position to notice your emotional buttons as they’re triggered. However, this is harder than you might think. We all think our emotional buttons are rational and reasonable, but that might not be the case. 

  • First, think back on all the times you’ve been very upset in the past. What triggered that reaction? What was said? What was the situation? Who was there? Do you see a pattern as you examine multiple situations? 
  • Pay attention to your emotional reactions over the next month. Notice when your emotions take a sharp turn. Determine the cause. 

2. Ask for help. It’s not easy to know yourself. The way you see yourself is very different from the way the rest of the world sees you. Ask a few friends to give their opinion regarding your emotional buttons. Ask family members for input. You might be surprised by the reactions you receive. 

3. Make a list of your emotional buttons. Make a list of all the triggers you’re able to identify. Write them out so you can actually see them. Keep adding to your list until you feel it is complete. 

  • Do you see a pattern? For example, you might despise people cutting you off in traffic, tardiness, and being interrupted. This would suggest that disrespect is what really triggers you. 

4. Identify how those emotional buttons are hurting you. Go through each emotional button and think about the harm it is causing you. It might be hurting your chances for a promotion at work. It could be damaging your relationships. 

  • Each one of your emotional buttons is harming you in some way, even if it’s just damaging your emotional comfort. 

5. Consider the cause. Why do these things trigger you? Your emotional buttons aren’t the same as someone else’s. Why do these particular things get such an emotional rise from you? Why does something bother you but mean little to someone else? 

6. Identify a more effective response. Go through your list of emotional buttons and think about the ideal response for each one. What would be the most appropriate or advantageous response on your part? 

7. Monitor yourself. Give your new and improved responses a try. When you notice yourself being triggered, be thoughtful enough to use your new response. See how it goes. It might take a while to learn to be present enough to remember your intention. 

8. Be patient. It’s very challenging to be thoughtful and logical during a time of high emotion. Your brain doesn’t function in the same way when it’s emotionally aroused. However, with sufficient practice, your new responses will become automatic. 

What are your emotional buttons? Have you ever noticed that your emotional buttons are different from other people you know? That means that emotional buttons aren’t universal. We form them ourselves based on our experiences and our unique perceptions of these experiences. 

Emotional buttons can be a big obstacle to moving your life forward, your career, and your relationships. They can even pose a big challenge to your emotional and physical health. 

Do your best to minimize the effect your emotional triggers have on your life and you’ll enjoy less stress and greater peace and serenity with your life and those around you. 

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Modern Rules for Coping with Boredom https://duckboardsandstilts.com/modern-rules-for-coping-with-boredom/ https://duckboardsandstilts.com/modern-rules-for-coping-with-boredom/#respond Mon, 13 Jun 2022 19:15:00 +0000 https://duckboardsandstilts.com/?p=20525 Disaster movies teach you how to outrun zombies and forage for food, but they rarely mention the dangers of boredom. What do you do when…

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Disaster movies teach you how to outrun zombies and forage for food, but they rarely mention the dangers of boredom. What do you do when your usual activities are canceled, and you need to take a break from streaming? 

Jetting off to an exotic destination or working at a communal table in your local cafe may be too risky for you. However, there are many enriching projects to fill your time. 

Try these low-risk strategies for coping with boredom. 

Interesting Things You Can Do on Your Own 

Maybe you live alone, or your loved ones are busy with their own responsibilities. Learning to entertain yourself is a useful skill. 

Try these activities to break up the monotony: 

1. Adopt a new attitude. Fighting boredom starts from within. When a task seems tedious, remind yourself of the purpose behind what you’re doing. Continue learning and stay on the lookout for new things to try. 

2. Establish routines. Do you feel like you’re drifting aimlessly? Replace some of the structure you may have lost. Wake up at the same time each day and change out of your pajamas. 

3. Start a hobby. Find a new hobby or invest more time in a pastime you used to enjoy. You might even create an additional source of income from refinishing furniture or decorating cakes. 

4. Do crafts. Express your creativity. Sketch still lifes and nature scenes. Carve wooden figures or make scented candles. 

5. Listen to music. Adding a soundtrack to your day can have a powerful effect on your mood. Sing along to your favorite tunes while you cook dinner or fill out your expense reports. 

6. Read books. Expand your mind with quality fiction and nonfiction. Reread a classic novel you remember from high school. Explore a historical era that interests you. 

7. Work out. Physical activity relieves stress and boredom, as well as enhancing your overall health. Go for a morning run or ride a stationary bicycle at home.

8. Pamper yourself. Treat yourself to something special. Paint your toenails a fun color or give yourself a makeover.

Interesting Things You Can Do with Others 

You can connect with others while maintaining your distance. 

Use these social strategies to fight boredom: 

1. Volunteer online. Support a worthy cause and savor the satisfaction of giving back to your community. Contact a local nonprofit to see if you can help with IT services or writing newsletter articles. 

2. Organize happy hours. Do you miss hanging out with your office buddies? Propose a weekly online gathering to help you stay in touch. 

3. Talk by phone. Video calls may be the closest thing to a face-to-face conversation. Check in with family and friends frequently. Surprise them with a handwritten letter or a greeting card. 

4. Take classes. Sign up for web courses that will advance your career or deepen your knowledge about subjects you care about. Earn certifications in accounting or marketing. Study architecture or rose gardening. 

5. Stream together. Sample one of the free online apps for hosting a virtual movie night. PIck a title your group will love and send out invitations. Eat popcorn and discuss the film afterwards. 

6. Meditate and pray. Maintaining your faith community can be especially challenging, but it’s worth the effort. Follow your church on Facebook or search the internet for online meditation groups and other services. 

7. Adopt a pet. Furry friends count too. If your circumstances allow, consider bringing home a cat or dog for extra companionship. 

Avoid quick fixes that might reduce your boredom temporarily, but leave you with regrets, like excess body weight and credit card bills. Enjoying a variety of meaningful activities will help you to stay engaged while you stay home. 

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How to Cope With Loneliness and Social Isolation in Today’s World https://duckboardsandstilts.com/how-to-cope-with-loneliness-and-social-isolation-in-todays-world/ https://duckboardsandstilts.com/how-to-cope-with-loneliness-and-social-isolation-in-todays-world/#respond Mon, 06 Jun 2022 19:28:00 +0000 https://duckboardsandstilts.com/?p=20587 Today, it’s challenging to have a great social life. This was true even before Covid-19 became an issue.  In the not-so-distant past, it used to…

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Today, it’s challenging to have a great social life. This was true even before Covid-19 became an issue. 

In the not-so-distant past, it used to be so boring to stay at home during the evenings and the weekends that people always looked for an excuse to get out of the house. But now, between streaming services, the internet, smartphones, and video games, it’s much easier to find an excuse to stay home. 

Covid-19 has only made the situation even more challenging. Now, there is a legitimate reason to avoid others. 

While a few select people seem to thrive with very little human contact, most people need to spend time with others to stay emotionally healthy and happy. 

Luckily, there are still things you can do to help maintain your emotional health, even when your time with others is reduced. 

Learn how to ease the discomfort of social isolation with these tips: 

1. Be productive. Just because you might be spending a lot of time alone doesn’t mean you just have to sit there and be miserable. Everyone feels better when they’re being productive. Some productive activities include: 

  • Paint the living room.
  • Volunteer to help others.
  • Take a class online.
  • Rearrange the pantry.
  • Take the car in to have the tires rotated.
  • Take the dog for a walk.
  • And many more 

2. Connect with others in a safe manner. Use your imagination and find a way to connect with people while making your health a priority. 

  • Use skype, zoom, and other options for talking “face-to-face.” 
  • Chat online via forums.
  • Sit outside by a fire in the fresh air and have a conversation with a friend. 

3. View beautiful things. What makes something beautiful? It makes you feel a certain way when you look at it. With your smartphone or computer, you can view just about anything in the world. Spend some time looking at beautiful things each day and you’ll feel great. 

  • Look at old photographs.
  • Go to a museum.
  • Find the most perfect tree in the park and really look at it. 

4. Take up a solo hobby. There are plenty of hobbies you can do by yourself. Paint, play chess online, hike, knit, write, or train your dog. A hobby is something you choose to do because it brings you pleasure. 

5. Get a pet. If you don’t have a pet, consider getting one. You can have a more meaningful relationship with the right pet than you can have with 99% of the people in the world. What type of animal interests you? 

6. Maintain a high level of self-care. Loneliness and social isolation often lead to poor self-care. It’s important to continue taking good care of yourself even if you’re spending a lot of time alone. For example, a shower isn’t something that you do just for others. It’s also something that you do for yourself. 

7. Be creative. Most people find they are more creative when they have time to themselves. Now is an ideal time to take advantage of your solitude. Let your creative juices flow! 

  • What ideas do you have?
  • What do you want to create?
  • What do you want to experiment with? 

Having a lot of free time alone doesn’t have to be a bad thing. There is a lot you can do to ease the discomfort of loneliness and social isolation. Technology makes it relatively easy to connect with others even if physical proximity is impossible. Feeling productive can also ease the pain of being alone. 

Instead of focusing on this great challenge, try to take advantage of its unique possibilities. You can learn more about yourself and try out a few hobbies. You’re free to explore your interests without interference from others. 

Just think – by developing other interests, when the time comes when you can reconnect socially, you’ll have a variety of new things to talk about. 

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Keep Calm and Write It Down https://duckboardsandstilts.com/keep-calm-and-write-it-down/ https://duckboardsandstilts.com/keep-calm-and-write-it-down/#respond Sun, 05 Jun 2022 19:20:00 +0000 https://duckboardsandstilts.com/?p=20591 Have you ever been in that place where your mind is racing and the things you need to attend to are on a perpetual loop…

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Have you ever been in that place where your mind is racing and the things you need to attend to are on a perpetual loop playing in your head, and you just can’t get anything done? If so, you will have experienced frustration, irritation, anxiety, and despair all at the same time. 

If, in addition, you’re up against time constraints, deadlines, or some kind of retribution if you don’t get past this problem, it’s possible to go into a form of mental shutdown. If you don’t resolve the issue soon, it could have some serious consequences for your mental health. 

The quickest and easiest route to alleviating the mental anguish of any challenge is: 

  • First, acknowledge it.
  • Accept that it exists, right here, right now. 
  • Affirm that you will resolve it, just like you’ve resolved a zillion other issues in your life so far. 
  • Then, take action to resolve it. 

The reason our head appears to be in this endless agitated loop is because we are allowing our subconscious mind to run our life. Now, this works very well for most of us, most of the time, but every once in a while, it gets out of hand. This is one of those times. 

Commit Pen to Paper 

We can stop our subconscious mind in its tracks simply by applying conscious thought to the issue. We need to interrupt our subconscious mind for a moment and get it back on track – our track, not its own track. 

This is best done by writing down everything that comes to mind. 

Using pen and paper for this exercise rather than your laptop, phone, or tablet works the best. There is something almost magical to be gained by the act of physically writing 

The very act of consciously thinking and committing pen to paper is enough to interrupt your subconscious mind. 

So initially, write down what it is that you are experiencing, how you are feeling, what pain you feel you are going through over this issue. Then detail the issue itself as best you can. Don’t worry about spelling, grammar or even the order you write this stuff down. It doesn’t matter. 

If you want to have a rant on paper about the circumstances you find yourself in, so much the better. The more you get out on the paper the less you will have spinning around in your head. Keep going until you have as much on paper as you can reasonably expect to get out. 

Then go for a walk. Thirty minutes at least. 

While you are walking, you’ll have no need to allow your subconscious mind to revert back to its old self, because everything it was occupied with is now on several sheets of paper back on your desk. It’s gone. 

Listen to the Birds and Bees 

  • Be an observer of all that is going on around you on your walk:
  • Listen and see how many distinctly different sounds you can hear: birds, bees, trains, planes, automobiles, and more. 
  • Look and see how many different forms of life you can see: people, dogs, cats, insects, and birds, all busily going about their day in their own way. 
  • How many different smells can you identify? Are there any that are familiar? Are there any that you just cannot place? 
  • How are you feeling right now? Warm? Cold? Somewhere in between? Do you notice anything else about yourself? 

All of these things are causing you to engage your conscious mind. It’s like you’re giving your subconscious mind a much-needed breather. 

Enjoy your walk and marvel at the fact that all of life is going on around you at the moment, all engaged in their own form of activities, all completely separate and yet all interconnected at the same time. 

Back at Home – Tasks to Complete 

Now that you’ve uncluttered your mind, read through the notes you wrote earlier. You’ll find that now you have greater clarity. 

Write down the three most important things you need to get done today on a clean sheet of paper. Then: 

  • Choose one task from your 3 most important tasks. Choose any one. Make a decision on what you can do about it and take action to move it forward towards completion. 
  • Then, choose a second task and repeat the exercise. 
  • When that’s done, take the third task. Make a decision and take action on that one. 

Then go for another walk, at least 30 minutes. Observe all the business of life itself while you are just walking. 

When you get home, have a cup of coffee and relax. You’ll notice how your mental state has completely changed. Your mind is no longer racing, and you can feel good about yourself, knowing that you’ve handled the most important tasks of the day. 

The next time that you find your head in a spin, remember: Keep Calm and Write It Down! 

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PTSD Doesn’t Only Affect Soldiers – It Could Affect You Too https://duckboardsandstilts.com/ptsd-doesnt-only-affect-soldiers-it-could-affect-you-too/ https://duckboardsandstilts.com/ptsd-doesnt-only-affect-soldiers-it-could-affect-you-too/#respond Tue, 31 May 2022 19:57:00 +0000 https://duckboardsandstilts.com/?p=20617 Many people associate post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) with combat soldiers. But there are many sufferers of PTSD that were never in the military. Any traumatic…

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Many people associate post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) with combat soldiers. But there are many sufferers of PTSD that were never in the military. Any traumatic event can result in PTSD. 

The ability to deal with trauma and stress varies greatly from person to person. 

While some people can handle nearly any event without long-term effects, others are considerably more fragile. 

PTSD is much more common than most people realize! 

Serious PTSD symptoms include: 

1. Flashbacks or other forms of reliving the event. These can include bad dreams, recurring thoughts, or being triggered by anything that reminds the sufferer of the traumatic event. Physical symptoms are usually experienced, including pain, sweating, and trembling. 

  • It’s possible to even see the traumatic event as if it is happening all over again. 

2. Hypervigilance. This is an over-alertness in anticipation of possible danger, for example: scanning crowds for dangerous people, sitting in a certain place at home to avoid being seen through any windows, or an over-reliance on weapons in case the home is suddenly invaded by bad guys. 

  • The person suffering from hypervigilance is consumed with the idea that something bad is going to happen. So, they’re always prepared for the worst, even if the worst has zero possibility of ever occurring. This can look like paranoia to the casual observer. 

3. Disturbed sleep. Insomnia is a common symptom in those with PTSD. Nightmares and night sweats can also occur. It’s not easy to sleep when you have post-traumatic stress disorder. 

4. Irritability and aggressive behavior. Those with PTSD are often easily agitated and are prone to over-reacting with aggression. 

5. Altered thoughts. This may take the form of believing that the sufferer is bad or that all people are bad. Feelings of guilt, shame, and anger are also common. 

These symptoms can range from annoying to life-altering. At the most extreme, sufferers of PTSD are unable to work and pose a serious threat to themselves and others. Suicide is common in the most extreme cases. And those with PTSD are known to hurt others as well. 

There are many possible causes of PTSD outside of combat: 

1. Sexual abuse. Sexual abuse is more common in children than any of us would like to acknowledge. This is a powerful trauma that many victims struggle to process effectively. 

2. Emotional abuse. The mind can only take so much abuse before it changes in a negative way. Emotional abuse can have effects that last years after the abuse. This can happen in adults, as well as children. 

3. Physical abuse or other violence. Regular physical abuse can lead to post-traumatic stress disorder. It’s also possible for single events to result in PTSD. This can include being the victim of a violent crime such as robbery or rape. 

4. Stressful experience. It could be a car accident, almost falling off a cliff, the health issues of a loved one, or seeing someone suffer an injury. Nearly anything that creates a strong stress response can cause PTSD. 

5. Mental illness. Many mental illnesses can be stressful. They can also make the sufferer much more susceptible to stressful events. 

PTSD is a common challenge, even among those that have never served in the military or with the police. Trauma can be found nearly anywhere in society. Watching a loved one die or experiencing a mugging can result in post-traumatic stress disorder. 

If you have any of the symptoms listed above, know that help for your symptoms is available. Make an appointment with your physician to get some much-needed relief. 

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A 3-Step Process to Stop Worry https://duckboardsandstilts.com/a-3-step-process-to-stop-worry/ https://duckboardsandstilts.com/a-3-step-process-to-stop-worry/#respond Fri, 27 May 2022 19:48:00 +0000 https://duckboardsandstilts.com/?p=20585 Most everyone has worried about something in their life on occasion, but some people manage to turn it into a full-time job!  Worry is a…

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Most everyone has worried about something in their life on occasion, but some people manage to turn it into a full-time job! 

Worry is a state of mind where the same issue goes around and around in an endless loop with no intention of ever coming to an end. 

The prime reason we allow it to continue is because we feel that by having the problem constantly in our mind, front and center, it will magically find a solution, and the issue will go away. It’s like we know that, when we find a solution, the worry will evaporate, but we put no effort into actually finding the solution. 

Worry can sap all your emotional, mental, and even physical energy, and it will if you continue to give it permission to do so. So, you have to stop giving your permission. But how do you do that? 

Before You Start 

Think back to a previous time and make a note of every time you have worried in the past, and how that worry solved anything. 

… Can’t think of one? Okay, let’s move on. 

There must have been a time in the past where worrying was actually useful for you. Explain one time where worrying created a benefit for you that you have been able to use to make your life better. 

… Can’t think of one? Okay, let’s move on. 

One last thing. Let’s give this worry one last chance before we tackle it head on. Worry with as much angst and despair as you can for the next 30 minutes to see what happens. Go! 

… Nothing changed? Okay, let’s move on. 

You have discovered for yourself that worry never actually solved anything, right? You have also discovered for yourself that worry has never created a single benefit for you or made your life better, right? And finally, you have worried to the best of your ability for 30 minutes straight and nothing changed, right? 

The Process 

Now that you’ve seen that worrying doesn’t resolve the situation, and, in fact, has multiple negative consequences, let’s look at how you can stop the worry. 

Follow these 3 steps:

1. Write down a detailed description of the issue.It’s important to clarify exactly what it is that you’re worrying about. 

  • How it came to be there
  • What the cause of it was
  • How this issue will affect your life
  • Any other pertinent details 

2. Next, write down what needs to happen for this issue to be resolved to your satisfaction. If there is more than one solution, write them all down. You might think of more solutions later, but for now, just write the ones that come to mind. 

3. Make a decision and take action. 

  • Choose one solution and take action to implement it. It doesn’t even matter if you make the wrong decision and take the wrong action, because you can easily make another decision and take another action if the first one doesn’t work out. 
  • Sometimes, there’s nothing you can do to alleviate the issue itself, but you can still choose how you respond. Instead of negatively affecting your wellbeing by worrying, each time you start to worry, immediately redirect your thoughts to something positive. This takes practice, but the more you practice, the easier it becomes. 

So, the next time you find worry creeping up on you, just STOP, make a detailed description of it, write down some possible solutions to it, make a decision, and get into action. You’ll find that, as soon as you tackle the issue in this way, your worry will dissipate. 

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13 Strategies That Help You Release Sadness https://duckboardsandstilts.com/13-strategies-that-help-you-release-sadness/ https://duckboardsandstilts.com/13-strategies-that-help-you-release-sadness/#respond Sat, 21 May 2022 19:17:00 +0000 https://duckboardsandstilts.com/?p=20629 What can you do when sad thoughts are weighing you down and making it difficult to take care of your responsibilities? Sorrow is a part…

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What can you do when sad thoughts are weighing you down and making it difficult to take care of your responsibilities? Sorrow is a part of life, but there are ways to build your resilience. 

Denying or suppressing your emotions usually backfires. Your feelings are likely to build up and complicate your life even more. Find more effective ways to cope by using these methods for releasing sadness. 

Steps to Take on Your Own: 

1. Accept your feelings. You may have grown up in a family where sadness was considered a weakness, or uncomfortable emotions were ignored in the hope they would go away. As an adult, you can make positive changes. Healing begins with acknowledging your feelings. 

2. Find the words. Clarifying your thoughts helps too. Increase your self-awareness and understanding by distinguishing between different experiences such as loneliness or grief. 

3. Let yourself cry. Shedding a few tears eliminates toxins and causes hormonal shifts that lower your stress levels and strengthen your immune system. Pick a safe time and place and give yourself permission to cry. 

4. Take deep breaths. Simple breathing exercises provide relief too. Inhaling and exhaling slowly and deeply eases physical symptoms of sadness, like tension headaches or a lump in your throat. 

5. Keep a journal. Maybe writing your thoughts down will help you to process them. A journal gives you more opportunities to spot patterns and reframe your thoughts. Choose a format that works for you and try to write for at least a few minutes each day. 

6. Express your creativity. Writing is just one of many options for channeling your sadness. Some studies suggest that sadness fuels creativity by encouraging self-reflection. You may be inspired to draw or cook. 

7. Listen to music. When you need quick and easy relief, put together a playlist of songs that lift your spirits. Dance and sing along to German opera or heavy metal. 

8. Work out. Exercise can be a powerful antidote for sadness and even some symptoms of more serious depression. Keep things interesting by designing a variety of routines using activities you love. 

9. Practice self-care. Make regular exercise one part of your overall wellness program for dealing with sadness and stress. Remember to eat a balanced diet and aim for at least 8 hours of sleep each night. 

Steps to Take with Others: 

1. Call a friend. Talk with your loved ones when you’re going through a major setback or minor frustrations are piling up. Be ready to do the same for them. Sharing your concerns helps you to put them in perspective and discover new insights. 

2. Help out. Focusing on others is likely to make you happier. Do volunteer work online or in your local community. Lend a hand to your neighbors and coworkers. The solution to your own predicaments may pop up while you’re directing your efforts elsewhere. 

3. Pet your dog. A large body of research confirms that interacting with animals is less stressful than talking with other humans. You can cheer yourself up by scratching your dog’s ears or taking them for a long walk. 

4. Consider therapy. If your sadness lasts for weeks or interferes with your usual activities, you may be experiencing clinical depression. Help is available. Call a hotline or follow your doctor’s recommendations. 

Be gentle and patient with yourself when you’re feeling blue. Developing effective coping strategies will help you to thrive during dark times and enjoy happier days. 

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What You Can Do if You’re Feeling Socially Isolated https://duckboardsandstilts.com/what-you-can-do-if-youre-feeling-socially-isolated/ https://duckboardsandstilts.com/what-you-can-do-if-youre-feeling-socially-isolated/#respond Mon, 15 Nov 2021 19:02:00 +0000 https://duckboardsandstilts.com/?p=20659 There are a lot of people that feel alone these days. It’s not easy or safe to casually meet for dinner at a restaurant. It’s…

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There are a lot of people that feel alone these days. It’s not easy or safe to casually meet for dinner at a restaurant. It’s not advisable to meet at a friend’s house for a poker tournament. 

A lot of the regular activities you normally use to connect with others and to get out of the house are off-limits now. It’s natural to feel out of sorts and isolated. 

However, where there’s a will, there’s a way. There are opportunities to connect with others if you’re willing to think outside the box. 

Find new ways to stay in touch with the outside world: 

1. Be creative. Maybe your normal social channels and activities are now unavailable to you. That just means you need to be creative and find new ways to connect with others and spend your time. 

  • Maybe you were in a bit of a rut anyway. Now might be a great opportunity to make a few changes in your life. 

2. Meet safely.Go for a walk with a friend. Wear your mask and stay six feet apart. You can easily enjoy a walk together, have a conversation, and keep your distance. 

  • Meet at the park and share a coffee.
  • There are plenty of ways to meet and be safe about it. 

3. Use the phone. You can do more with that magical smartphone than just watch funny videos, play games, and text. Call people and talk to them. Conversational skills have really gone downhill over the last decade. Reconnect via your phone and have an honest conversation. 

4. Use the internet. There are countless ways to use the internet to connect with others. Let’s consider just a few: 

  • Skype and Zoom. These are just two of many software platforms that allow you to see and talk to others. Zoom is great if you want to talk to multiple people at once. 
  • Online gaming. You can play card games, chess, checkers, and many other games and have a conversation at the same time. 
  • Forums. If you want to be more anonymous, forums provide a great outlet for sharing your thoughts, but not your name or your face. 

5. Take up a hobby. What do you like to do? What would you like to learn? Maybe you’d like to take up gardening this spring? Dancing? Chess? Piano? Knitting? Woodworking? Painting? Writing? 

  • What could you see yourself doing that would be fun and interesting and take your mind off the current situation? 

6. Be creative. Create something. A blog. A painting. A book. A song. A poem. A scrapbook. A flower arrangement. A set of shelves. Look for a creative outlet that interests you and let your creative side out for a change. Share what you create with the world. Take a picture or make a video and post it online. 

7. Exercise. Exercise is a great way to change your perspective. It also helps to keep your mind and body healthy. What type of activity do you like to do? Do it. 

8. Be safe. It’s easy to become fatigued with the Covid-19 situation and let your guard down. Avoid becoming reckless. Look for safe outlets for your need to connect with others. 

The pandemic won’t last forever. In the meantime, if you’re feeling isolated, be creative and reach out to the people in your life. Maybe you can’t sit on the couch and watch a movie together, but there are other meaningful ways to interact with each other. Find new and enjoyable ways to spend your time alone and to connect with others. 

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15 Art Therapy Exercises You Can Do at Home https://duckboardsandstilts.com/15-art-therapy-exercises-you-can-do-at-home/ https://duckboardsandstilts.com/15-art-therapy-exercises-you-can-do-at-home/#respond Wed, 10 Nov 2021 19:52:00 +0000 https://duckboardsandstilts.com/?p=20673 Art therapy is an interesting field of mental health care that is based on the premise that expressing yourself creatively can enhance well-being and promote…

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Art therapy is an interesting field of mental health care that is based on the premise that expressing yourself creatively can enhance well-being and promote emotional healing. It can also boost self-awareness. 

While there are licensed art therapists, you can do many of the same art therapy exercises at home that you would do in a clinical setting. 

You don’t have to be a great artist to receive the benefits of art therapy. Anyone can draw, paint, color, sculpt, or create a collage. It’s true that some can do these things better than others, but skill is irrelevant in art therapy. The act of creating is what’s important. 

Try these art therapy activities: 

1. Create sock puppets and put on a play. Making a couple of sock puppets will put a smile on anyone’s face. You can act out a scene from your life. Maybe you want to re-enact a fight you had with your spouse. Or help a child vent their frustrations related to a bullying incident. 

2. Create a sculpture that matches your mood. Get your hands on some clay or Play-Doh and let your imagination run wild. Feeling anxious? Create a sculpture that represents that feeling. Dealing with some rage? See what ideas you have for representing rage with clay. 

3. Make a collage with photographs that you love. Go through your old photos and make copies of some of your favorites. Create a collage that exemplifies the emotions that those photographs stimulate in you. 

4. Draw a picture that represents utopia to you. What is your version of a perfect life or a perfect world? Draw it. What makes it so perfect for you? 

5. Create a painting that represents your childhood. What are the most important moments of your childhood? Will you include only positive memories? Or are you in the mood to get your hands dirty and deal with the negative events, too? 

6. Draw or paint your negative traits. Consider your negative traits and find a way to represent them in a piece of art. 

7. Draw or paint your positive traits. Do the same with your positive traits.

8. Make a flag with a motto that represents your intentions. What motto would you put on a flag that best describes your intention in life? 

  • Power?
  • Sacrifice?
  • Peace on
  • Earth?
  • Love?
  • Domination? 

9. Make a dreamcatcher and find a place to hang it in your room. If you don’t know what a dreamcatcher looks like, look it up online. Create your own version of a dreamcatcher and put it in an appropriate place. 

10. Draw a scene from one of your nightmares. Since we’re on the subject of sleep and dreams, recreate a scene from a recent bad dream. If you haven’t tried your hand at drawing lately, now would be a good time. 

11. Build an altar. Create an altar that is unique to you and will help you to connect fully with your spiritual side. 

12. Create a map of all the personal connections in your life. Put yourself in the center and diagram all of the relationships you have. Compare that to all the relationships you had 10 years ago. What’s changed? 

13. Create a website. There are plenty of places to create a free website, such as www.wordpress.com. Build a website that represents your interests. 

14. Paint a rock. List your values on the rock and put it where you can see it each day. 

15. Draw your safe place. Use any medium you like. Create a place that makes you feel safe from the world. 

Art therapy is a gift that you can give yourself. Pick one exercise and give it a try. Experiment and see what happens. These 15 exercises are just the tip of the iceberg. There are hundreds more for you to discover. 

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The Secret to Maintaining Emotional Balance When You’re Unemployed https://duckboardsandstilts.com/the-secret-to-maintaining-emotional-balance-when-youre-unemployed/ https://duckboardsandstilts.com/the-secret-to-maintaining-emotional-balance-when-youre-unemployed/#respond Thu, 04 Nov 2021 13:02:24 +0000 https://duckboardsandstilts.com/?p=20687 Being unemployed can stir up strong emotions even during ordinary times. When you add on the uncertainty of living through a pandemic, you may feel…

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Being unemployed can stir up strong emotions even during ordinary times. When you add on the uncertainty of living through a pandemic, you may feel overwhelmed. How can you maintain emotional balance if you’re looking for a new position under these conditions? 

Chances are you’re dealing with the usual hardships related to being laid off, but you may have fewer available solutions. You’re receiving rejection letters and worrying about your finances. Yet, it’s more difficult to go to job fairs or invite a contact out for coffee. 

Paying extra attention to your overall wellbeing will help you to navigate this difficult time and keep your job hunt on track. 

Try these tips for protecting your peace of mind while you’re jobless. 

Tips for Managing Stress: 

1. Set realistic goals. When the outcomes are beyond your control, you can still set process goals, such as submitting at least 3 applications each week. You may also want to extend your timeline, so you’ll feel less pressured if job offers take a while to come through. 

2. Maintain routines. Structuring your days will make you feel more secure. Enjoy regular mealtimes and keep up with your hobbies. 

3. Take time to relax. You’ll accomplish more if you take refreshing breaks. Go for a walk around the block or in your local park. 

4. Avoid multitasking. Studies show that trying to do too many things at once makes you more anxious and less productive. Figure out your top priorities and give them your full attention. 

5. Ask for help. If you drink or overeat to reduce tension, you may wind up with more troubles than when you started. Talk things over with a trusted friend or call a hotline to find resources in your community. 

Tips for Practicing Self-Care: 

1. Sleep well. Are you binge watching past your usual bedtime? Aim for 7 to 8 hours of sleep each night, so you’ll wake up ready to handle your responsibilities. 

2. Eat healthy. Get most of your calories from whole foods rich in fiber and nutrients. Load up on vegetables, fruits, and whole grains. Choose healthy fats and lean proteins. Limit highly processed items like snack cakes and sugary drinks. 

3. Exercise regularly. Shoot for at least half an hour of aerobic activity each day as well as strength training and heavier activity twice a week. Find a variety of activities you can enjoy doing at home or go outdoors to get some fresh air. 

4. Look sharp. Change out of your pajamas each morning and comb your hair, so you’ll be ready for any last-minute Zoom interviews. If you want a makeover, browse online for free hair and beauty apps. 

Tips for Cheering Yourself Up: 

1. Laugh it up. Lighten your mood by adding a little humor to your day. Watch baby animal videos or an episode of your favorite comedy show. Play with your kids and pets. Spend time with family and friends who appreciate your jokes. 

2. Cultivate gratitude. Count your blessings. Start a gratitude journal and read it over when you’re feeling down. Thank others and let them know how they make a positive difference in your life. 

3. Give generously. It can be difficult to notice others’ struggles when you’re caught up in your own situation. However, giving will make you feel happier and increase your self-esteem. Offer to go grocery shopping for an elderly neighbor or volunteer online for a worthy cause. 

It will be easier to cope if you take care of yourself while you look for your next career opportunity. Treat yourself with compassion and follow a daily plan that will help you to manage stress and target your efforts.

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Decrease Your Mental Chatter and Find Greater Peace https://duckboardsandstilts.com/decrease-your-mental-chatter-and-find-greater-peace/ https://duckboardsandstilts.com/decrease-your-mental-chatter-and-find-greater-peace/#respond Wed, 25 Aug 2021 19:52:00 +0000 https://duckboardsandstilts.com/?p=20561 Have you ever felt frustrated with the amount of thoughts that your mind is throwing at you, especially when you’re already feeling stressed or overwhelmed?…

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Have you ever felt frustrated with the amount of thoughts that your mind is throwing at you, especially when you’re already feeling stressed or overwhelmed? It’s like an unruly roommate that you can’t get rid of. The noise never seems to stop. 

This can be distracting at best. At worst, it can undermine your confidence and optimism. 

While it isn’t possible to stop your mental chatter completely, there is plenty that you can do to tame it. 

Keep these techniques in mind when you need an escape from your mental chatter: 

1. Try using 5-4-3-2-1. When the noise in your head won’t seem to stop, try 5-4-3-2-1. This little exercise will get you out of your head and focused on your environment. 

  • Look around your environment and describe five things you see. For example: “I see a pair of shoes. They are made of brown leather, have a low heel, and rubber soles. They look old.” It’s easy to find five things you see, but the remainder of the exercise is a little more challenging. 
  • Describe four things you hear. “In the distance, I can hear car horns honking.” Really focus your attention on the noises you can hear and fully experience them. 
  • Describe three things you feel. It could be the cool breeze blowing over your skin, the firm chair underneath you, or the pain in your elbow. 
  • Describe two things you smell. You might have to really concentrate to come up with two. 
  • Tell yourself one thing you like about yourself. By the time you’ve finished all five parts of this exercise, your focus will be in the present instead of on the noise in your head. 

2. Avoid engaging with your mental chatter. Your brain is going to make noise. There’s no way to stop it completely. The key is to ignore it. View the chatter in your head as nonsense and let it go. 

3. Learn to meditate. Meditation creates a lot of opportunities for dealing with mental noise, because there’s nothing to distract you from it. Learn how to meditate and spend some time each day meditating to calm your mind. 

4. Write it out. Set aside time each day to write down the things you’re randomly thinking. It’s very cathartic and really works if you give it a chance. After 10-20 minutes, take the paper you’ve been writing on and destroy it. 

5. Use affirmations. Affirmations can improve your life. They also crowd out the noise. When the noise starts, use an affirmation to keep your mind occupied on thoughts that you want. 

  • Have a list of affirmations ready to go. Pick one and use it when necessary. 

6. Use a mantra. Using a mantra is the same idea as using an affirmation. Your mantra could just be a meaningless sound or something more significant. 

Drown out the noise! 

7. Focus on your breathing. Put your attention on your breathing. This is convenient, because it’s always available to you. 

8. Listen to music. Playing music in the background while you work can help to keep in the internal voices at bay. Be careful that you don’t listen to something so distracting that you can’t concentrate on whatever it is that you’re doing. This might take some experimentation and practice. 

Your brain creates thoughts. That’s what it’s designed to do. But there are solutions you can employ to reduce the noise. Attempting to eliminate your internal voice is a waste of time, but you can greatly reduce the noise and avoid engaging with it. 

Just because your permanent roommate decides to speak doesn’t mean you have to listen! Practice these methods to reduce or prevent an overabundance of thoughts that you don’t want. 

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How to Overcome Frustration and Disappointment https://duckboardsandstilts.com/how-to-overcome-frustration-and-disappointment/ https://duckboardsandstilts.com/how-to-overcome-frustration-and-disappointment/#respond Sun, 22 Aug 2021 19:50:00 +0000 https://duckboardsandstilts.com/?p=20471 Are there times when you’ve been working hard to make progress on something or just get it completed, yet despite your best efforts, it just…

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Are there times when you’ve been working hard to make progress on something or just get it completed, yet despite your best efforts, it just isn’t going well, and you feel frustrated and disappointed about that? 

It can be like you’re running through mud, using up all your energy, but you’re not getting very far at all! 

Experiencing these kinds of disappointments can be really stressful, especially if you are up against a time constraint. 

You can very easily become totally despondent, and then despair creeps in. The good news is, however, that you can get past this. You will get past it, as others have done before you. 

The project that you’ve been working on likely isn’t the issue. Maybe you were in line for a promotion. You thought you would get it but didn’t. Maybe you are trying to explore the possibilities of a completely new career, but after all the effort expended, you still have no idea what kind of new career might be best for you. 

This is just part of life, and pretty much everyone has been in this place before. Some of us have been there many times. When we get in these situations, it’s important to find different ways to move us over, under, around, or through them and not spend too much time dwelling on them. 

To overcome your frustration and disappointment, you only need to spend enough time thinking about your circumstances to get a good handle on the situation. Then, take action and create a change in the way you are seeing it. 

The fastest and most effective way of changing anything is to make a decision and take action. 

Consider these actions that others have done to make a positive difference: 

1. Reframe it. Reframe the situation and it takes on a whole new perspective. View the frustration that you are experiencing as a good thing because frustration means that you are just about to learn something. 

  • Look for the lesson. Once you’ve found it, you will never need to go back there again. 

2. Change your routine. Your daily routine has a bigger impact on the way you show up in life than you think. If you find yourself in a mind-set that is not supporting you, change your routine. 

  • Go for a run, ride your bike, or go for a walk. Go somewhere different, go in the rain. Get close to nature. Do something exhilarating. 
  • Your whole demeanour will change for the better in 60 minutes or less and so will the challenge that you are wrestling with. 

3. Seek encouragement and Inspiration. Who do you know who can inspire you? Encourage you? Share some life wisdom with you? We all have someone we respect, trust, and enjoy talking over difficult situations with. 

  • Oftentimes, just explaining the situation can shine a light on a solution or a strategy that can resolve a difficult issue. 

4. Adjust your attitude. It’s not what happens to you, it’s what you do about it that matters. Acknowledge that you are in a place of frustration and disappointment, but also acknowledge that you can and will get past it. Other people have, and so will you. 

  • There is nothing that is going to be insurmountable. Start from the viewpoint that there is a solution here, and you will find it. 

5. Be open to new ideas. Getting good at anything is easiest done by learning from other people’s experiences. Always be open to new ideas, different ways of seeing things, additional strategies, and especially new attitudes. 

  • More often than not, it’s not the situation or circumstance that is the root of the issue. It’s either the way we are approaching it or the way we are perceiving it. 
  • If someone else has a methodology for resolving these issues, don’t reinvent the wheel, but follow in their footsteps. 

6. Expect a positive outcome. If you adopt a perspective of positive expectancy, whereby you know that it doesn’t matter what happens, and you’re absolutely certain that everything will work out perfectly, more often than not, it really does. 

  • If you can get this one into your daily affirmations, everything will change for the better. 

Don’t let frustration and disappointment rule over you. Use these tips to get past them and move forward toward the future you want! 

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